There was no Renaissance. There was no Technossance. Everything from prehistoric times was a Richossance. It was a violent time. The world has never been the same. It will never be the same.
No more travel updates. No need. Travel back in time to kill all the dinosaurs and preserve radio. You need a great radio station. Bring Brewington beer, dessert, travel passports, ghetto blasters, party balloons, old Mickey Mouse T-shirts, and wicked dinosaur bones.
Gary, the travel agent, could book a red-eye to nowhere and make it feel like a pilgrimage, mostly because his playlist hit harder than any itinerary. While flights delayed and brochures yellowed, he queued up deep-cut travel songs that turned his cramped office into a moving vehicle. Folks left with tickets in hand, heads nodding, already halfway gone thanks to the music.
When loading luggage in the overhead bin, make sure your radio is blasting. Make sure you have heavy-duty headphones for the long trip. Rock on like there’s no tomorrow. Rock like a pro. Ignore passport fraud, rising unemployment and through-the-roof gas prices. Get to my airport safely on a King Lear Jet.
Cross borders? No worries. It’s handled by Russians now. AM 2200 acquired rights to simulcast baseball games. No more leaks. The most valuable player, Pat Borders could catch. A classic radio show, almost from its own strike zone and in the history books. Travis Taylor played Wyatt McReynolds, and dude also traded cards.
Everybody loves Daniel. Don’t forget your passport. Make sure you arrive on time before the game.
Charge your phone before heading out into the wild. A headless parrot flies for eleven hours straight.
Funny, but if you’re looking for an adventure, you’ll want to be the first to discover The Lost Canyon Under Lake Fever, a place whispered about by other travel agents. Whether the canyon is real or just part of the legend hardly matters since the journey is worth it. And if all that exploring works up a thirst, the beer is pretty good, too.
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