Lionheart Radio

Buena Radio

All good on this easy-listening station. But Buck News wasn’t enough business for WOW radio. The station ruled, but old metal needed to be harder, stronger, tough as nails. O’Toole was cool. He had the audacity.

It seemed like only yesterday that Ottis had a titanic business meeting with the company executive Johnny Electric. I was really like a fly on the wall. I craved pizza, too. Pizza boxes ferried into the hut for only one Puerto Rican night.

It all started with a dream.
Puerto Rico’s Dream-Meeting Pizza Hut

“God, you really have a face for radio.” Johnny put on a black porky hat. Johnny was all decked out in all-black attire. He had on weird orthopedic shoes designed for the beach. A large book was by his side. He had just finished tweeting. The day zip-lining tired him, but he was down to fuck. Ready.

“Thanks.” Ottis thought about it, back home he was a blue jacket guy, immediately self-conscious of his unprepared, raggedy appearance. “Yeah, I guess I’m good. What do you really think of my impersonations of Mario Juan Valez? I did pretty good, don’t you think?” His voice sounded anxious. A pizza box was on the floor, and he had just finished stuffing his big mouth. His laptop opened up onto a 404 error.

“Good, but here’s the thing. This is a growing enterprise. And we require more from you, my good brother. Our radio stations capture the spirit of this native land. I want you to do more shows, be everybody’s favourite native, but make it lively. We need more. Some of your business news is alright, but we need better. Something more Aboriginal. You could be the next Indigenous Superman. Let’s make Indians great again. You could do it. Ottis, brother, have you ever heard of Edward Snowden?” Johnny smirked pleasurably.

“Yeah, I can do it.” Ottis chuckled. He thought. His face turned serious. Part of him wanted to succeed, the other part wanted to be great. “But how can I do better?”

“You need performance-enhancers,” Johnny said. “I can give you the goods.”

Ottis listened intently to Johnny’s advice. “Alright, alright, alright.” He wanted it all.

“But, can you fuck?” Johnny wanted to know.

“You bet. I’m a winner,” Ottis said.

“You need to hustle,” Johnny said.

“I learned from Larry Flynt.”

“But do you armour yourself?”

“Lionheart’s Shield XL Condoms.”

Johnny smiled. “Very good,” he said.

Two girls ran out and didn’t pay their tab.

A short meeting, but a very long flight home.


It was a bargain. Only two heavy shows, but worth the price of Johnny’s gold. The role of a lifetime created a new role for Ottis in Bro Radio on the Lionheart network. Wow.

The dark magic started with dreams of getting rich.

The Resort City

La Buena Radio Show #1
La Buena Radio Show #2

4 thoughts on “Buena Radio”

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